The older you get, you wear less shirts with sayings on them and acquire more mugs with sayings on them.
You know you've made it when you match on the coldest day of the year.
Vegas. What even happens there? I never hear.
You'd be walking like a baller too, if you had this bass in your ears.
Bookshelves are mirrors too.
What do you get when you add tight spaces, awkward small talk, and a tablespoon of pretzels?

The other guys.
Dog is man's best friend, because man's breath smells like meat.
Protip: one beer in the sun, equals two beers. Drink responsibly.
Whiskey and write is my Netflix and chill.
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